“Forgiving is not forgetting.” –Pastor Rich Ajer
Today is the 10 year anniversary of the tragedy of September 11, 2001. As I see all of the posts, flags, memorials, and other signs of patriotism, I can't help but wonder if our insistence on remembrance indicates a lack of forgiveness.
The tragedy directed affected the thousands who perished that day and the many more thousands of family members and friends of those who perished. The tragedy also indirectly affected the rest of the world. Friends of the friends and families, acquaintances, and coworkers all saw the grief experienced by those who lost loved ones. Americans as a whole felt personally attacked, citizens around the world undoubtedly felt the loss of their own country men and women who were lost in the towers and on the planes. Military members felt the attack on the Pentagon.
And what about the aftermath? Muslims and Middle Eastern people were blamed and viewed with suspicion regardless of the fact that the vast majority of them not only had nothing to do with the attacks but couldn’t even fathom the possibility of doing anything of the sort. The outpouring of hatred toward a race and religion was unlike anything that had been seen on U. S. soil since the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor.
Thankfully, we have learned much since the days of WWII and our Middle Eastern and Muslim citizens were not treated with the same disrespect as the Japanese Americans were, at least not on a large, government sponsored scale. The same may not be true in individual cases or small communities.
The injury to our people, our hearts, and our communities was great. But instead of breaking the American spirit, the tragedy created more community. Americans pledged more allegiance to their nation; community groups were formed; Americans were given another day to celebrate our freedom. But, a decade later, have we healed from the hurt of that day? Healing takes a long time, and it does not happen without effort on the part of the injured. When we break a bone, the bone needs assistance to heal properly. We apply a cast and allow it to rest. A cut is stitched and bandaged. What do we do for an injured heart?
I think the only way we can truly heal from the injury and insult of 10 years ago is to forgive those who caused the hurt. Forgiveness is a tall order, and likely much easier for me than for someone who lost a loved one in the tragedy. But it is probably more important for those who were directly affected.
To forgive is to end the resentment, anger, and hatred toward those who caused the injury. Some parts of that are easier: anger fades over time, hatred lessens. But resentment is something that we have to actively let go of. It is easy to hold on to resentment for a very long time. Resentment can be over something big or small. We resent the person who got the last serving of prime rib. We resent the person who won the heart of the one we loved. We resent ourselves for choices we made in the past. We resent God for allowing our loved ones to become ill or to pass away. We resent those who stole our loved ones and our security on Tuesday, September 11, 2001. Letting go of resentment takes a lot of work.
So now, as we remember the loss of life and the loss of security we experienced, as we see the increased security measures we take every day to protect ourselves from future attack, we need to ask: Have we forgiven? Because until we forgive, are we truly healed? Or do those who harmed us so long ago still have power over us?
I think that on this day of remembrance, we need to remember not only those who were lost, but also work toward full forgiveness of those who hurt us. And while we support with compassion and prayer the families and friends of the innocent who were lost, we need to extend compassion and prayer to the families of those who caused the tragedy. We need to remember those who have lost loved ones in the battles that have been waged as a result of the attack, both American and foreign.
It is easy to forget about the innocence of the families and friends of our “enemies.” It is easy to hold on to the resentment of the attacks of the day. But it is much more peace granting and rewarding in the end to let go of the resentment, to forgive the wrong, and to love and have compassion for those at fault.
It is an ongoing challenge to continue to give up the resentments that pile on us and to forgive others, but only by doing so can we find true peace.
JLS
